.....listen

Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger James 1:19

In a law class, a professor carefully explained the Latin phrase Audi Alteram Partem, which means "Hear the other party." After a long and thorough discussion, the professor asked if anyone still didn’t understand the rule. One woman quickly replied, "My husband."Everyone laughed — because honestly, we can all relate, can’t we? 

Listening sounds simple, but it’s one of the hardest things to actually do. Whether in marriage, friendships, church life, or even casual conversations, it’s so easy to jump in with our opinion, defend ourselves, or try to fix things — and so much harder to just listen.

But James challenges us: "Be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger." Good listening isn’t just polite. It says to the other person, "You matter. What you’re saying matters. Your heart matters." Listening encourages people. It shows respect. And it can often stop a lot of arguments before they even get started.

Proverbs adds another layer of wisdom, "If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame" Proverbs 18:13. When we fail to listen, we often jump to conclusions, hurt feelings unnecessarily, or miss what’s really going on beneath the surface. We end up responding to what we think someone is saying, rather than what they actually mean.

Listening is difficult because it takes humility. It means putting aside our desire to be right, to win the argument, or to make ourselves heard first. True listening is a quiet but powerful way to show love to others. And when we listen, we reflect the heart of God, who always listens to us.

So, next time you're tempted to speak first — whether with your spouse, your children, your coworkers, or even a stranger — ask God to help you to be quick to hear and slow to speak. Remember Audi Alteram Partem. “Hear the other party.”

- alan smith

Father, help me to slow down, and truly listen to the people I come in contact with. Teach me not to rush to speak or defend, but to listen first. May my ears be quick to hear and my tongue be slow to speak, that I may show your love to others. In Jesus’ name, amen.