The following is reported to be taken from a 1950's Home Economics textbook intended for high school girls, teaching them how to prepare for married life (Wednesday, I will share with you the updated '90s version):
1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal - on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.
2. Prepare yourself: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.
3. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too.
4. Prepare the children: Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces if they are small, comb their hair, and if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to
see them playing the part.
5. Minimize the noise: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise
of washer, dryer, dishwasher, or vacuum. Try to encourage the
children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm
smile and be glad to see him.
6. Some DON'TS: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't
complain if he's late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with
what he might have gone through that day.
7. Make him comfortable: Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or
suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready
for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak
in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and
unwind.
8. Listen to him: You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the
moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.
9. Make the evening his: Never complain if he does not take you out to
dinner or to other places of entertainment; instead try to understand
his world of strain and pressure and his need to be home and relax.
10. The Goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can relax.
I can see it now -- The women are ready to send in their unsubscription notices, while the men are all running off copies to post on the refrigerator door!
My, how things have changed in 50 years! At the risk of being misunderstood, I think there's much to be learned from the textbook above (stay with me on this one). It strikes me that the attitude proposed during the 50's was "do everything you can to make your spouse happy", while the attitude of our day is "you better do everything you can to make me happy". The concept of actually making a concerted effort to please the other one seems antiquated. But, for Christians, it shouldn't be!
The biggest problem I see with the textbook above is that the sacrifice is lop-sided. Women were told to make sacrifices for the well-being of their husbands, but men were not expected to do any such thing. And that could not be further from Biblical truth. Husbands, in fact, are called to a higher level of sacrifice. "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it." (Eph. 5:25).
Just imagine, though. What if both husbands and wives put as much effort into pleasing one another as the textbook above suggests? What if both husbands and wives stopped asking, "What have you done for me lately?" and started asking, "What can I do for you?" I know, often in a marriage one does all the giving and the other does all the taking, but just suppose that both spouses really made an effort to follow Paul's instruction: "Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others." (Phil. 2:4). Sounds like the ingredients of a marriage made in heaven!
1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal - on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.
2. Prepare yourself: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.
3. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too.
4. Prepare the children: Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces if they are small, comb their hair, and if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to
see them playing the part.
5. Minimize the noise: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise
of washer, dryer, dishwasher, or vacuum. Try to encourage the
children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm
smile and be glad to see him.
6. Some DON'TS: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't
complain if he's late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with
what he might have gone through that day.
7. Make him comfortable: Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or
suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready
for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak
in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and
unwind.
8. Listen to him: You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the
moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.
9. Make the evening his: Never complain if he does not take you out to
dinner or to other places of entertainment; instead try to understand
his world of strain and pressure and his need to be home and relax.
10. The Goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can relax.
I can see it now -- The women are ready to send in their unsubscription notices, while the men are all running off copies to post on the refrigerator door!
My, how things have changed in 50 years! At the risk of being misunderstood, I think there's much to be learned from the textbook above (stay with me on this one). It strikes me that the attitude proposed during the 50's was "do everything you can to make your spouse happy", while the attitude of our day is "you better do everything you can to make me happy". The concept of actually making a concerted effort to please the other one seems antiquated. But, for Christians, it shouldn't be!
The biggest problem I see with the textbook above is that the sacrifice is lop-sided. Women were told to make sacrifices for the well-being of their husbands, but men were not expected to do any such thing. And that could not be further from Biblical truth. Husbands, in fact, are called to a higher level of sacrifice. "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it." (Eph. 5:25).
Just imagine, though. What if both husbands and wives put as much effort into pleasing one another as the textbook above suggests? What if both husbands and wives stopped asking, "What have you done for me lately?" and started asking, "What can I do for you?" I know, often in a marriage one does all the giving and the other does all the taking, but just suppose that both spouses really made an effort to follow Paul's instruction: "Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others." (Phil. 2:4). Sounds like the ingredients of a marriage made in heaven!
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