theories

These are the results of a "Creative Scientific Theories Contest" sponsored several years ago by Omni magazine:

GRAND PRIZE WINNER:

When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet. And when toast is dropped, it always lands with the buttered side facing down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat; the two will hover, spinning inches above the ground. With a giant buttered cat array, a high-speed monorail could easily link New York with Chicago.

RUNNERS-UP:

#1

If an infinite number of rednecks riding in an infinite number of pickup trucks fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway signs, they will eventually produce all the world's great literary works in Braille.

#2

Why yawning is contagious: You yawn to equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure change outside your eardrums unbalances other people's ear pressures, so they must yawn to even it out.

#3

Communist China is technologically underdeveloped because they have no alphabet and therefore cannot use acronyms to communicate ideas at a faster rate.

#4

The earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, the cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously fast.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

The quantity of consonants in the English language is constant. If omitted in one place, they turn up in another. When a Bostonian "pahks" his "cah," the lost r's migrate southwest, causing a Texan to "warsh" his car and invest in "erl wells."

Birds take off at sunrise. On the opposite side of the world, they are landing at sunset. This causes the earth to spin on its axis.

Those are certainly some creative theories. I am reminded that over the years there have been some creative theories proposed to explain the empty tomb. The first theory came the same day the tomb was found empty: "When [the chief priests] had assembled with the elders and consulted together, they gave a large sum of money to the soldiers, saying, 'Tell them, "His disciples came at night and stole Him away while we slept." ' " (Matthew 28:12-13).

Other theories proposed include the suggestion that the women who reported the body missing went to the wrong tomb and just thought Jesus' tomb was empty, and that the appearances of Jesus after the resurrection were either illusions or mass hallucinations. Still others say that Jesus never really died; he merely fainted and later woke up in the tomb and walked out.

All fanciful theories. But none of them adequate the explain the event which showed the power of God more forcefully than anything else that has ever happened. Jesus Christ was raised from the dead!

"If Christ is not risen, then our preaching is empty and your faith is also empty......But now Christ is risen from the dead, and has become the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep." (I Cor. 15:14,20).

Father, we thank you for the hope which comes through the knowledge that Jesus Christ was raised from the dead almost 2,000 years ago. While we look to his crucifixion for the cleansing power of forgiveness, we look to his resurrection for the hope of our own resurrection which will one day bring your children into your presence. Until that day comes, we praise you for having such great power. In Jesus' name